The Sarcastic Journalist is a freelance writer and mother of two living near Houston, Texas. She has a degree in journalism and an addiction to magazines. She is hoping never to experience the "joy" of pregnancy again. You can find much more of her home-grown snark at: shenuts.com
In addition to recounting 40 not-so-glowing but hilarious weeks of her pregnancy for our pregnancy calendar the Sarcastic Journalist used her sarcasm super-powers to help make our new edgy sarcastic pregnancy tickers. Check 'em out!
Week 8 : We’re having a ****!
There’s a scene in the movie “Father of the Bride Part Two” where the daughter, Annie, announces to her family that she is pregnant. There is a big whoop de doo where everyone jumps up and down at the news.
All I could think is “Ha ha, she did it!”Okay. I know. I’m an adult and the majority of adults “do it” from time to time. Fertility treatments aside, “doing it” is pretty much how most women get pregnant. So why the immaturity?
Usually, unless you announce it to everyone, what goes on in the bedroom stays in the bedroom. But all it takes is one little due date announcement for people to realize what you were doing a month ago!
Or, in my case, all it took was an “I’m pregnant!” for both my Mom and Mother-in-law to figure out what we did at Disney World for our anniversary!
“I’m going to stop coming to your house,” my Mother-in-law joked. “Every time I come to visit, you announce your pregnancy a month later.”
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Where do you go during the summer vacation?
I go to Barcelona. Who goes to Barcelona yet?
That is SO funny and true! My story is VERY embarrasing because when I told her I was pregnant, my grandma said "oh that means you go preganant when you were on vacation at my house!" How mortifying...i mean she's my GRANDMA!
I almost always have that thought when I see a pregnant woman too. It's crazy how the human brain works. I'm also glad that I'm not the only one who thinks that. Whew.
I have to say, when I found out I was pregnant with my first, that was the thing that held me back the most from telling my parents. I was like, now my dad is going to know FOR SURE that we're doing it...
That reminds me of a joke:
Little Johnny's mother tells him that if he swallows watermelon seed he'll grow a watermelon in his belly. The next day Johnny and his mother are walking along the street and spot a very pregnant woman. Johnny stops, points and says, "I know what you've been doing."
Kinda silly I know, but something I think pregnant women, and other generally perverted people, will think is funny.
That's funny!! We always say our first child is our souvinier from Disney World!! :)My mother in law gets a big kick out of it!!
haha! My parents came to visit around mid march and stayed at our new house. my baby was conceived on the 23rd of March. When I told my mom I was pregnant, after all of the excitement she said "eww, you 'did it' when me and your dad were there!" I made sure I told her it was AFTER they left, but it was still a weird thought that my mom was thinking about my sex!!
I have a cousin, Eric, who's exactly 1 month younger than me. I'm extremely close to him as I have no siblings. I remember when we fell pregnant with our first, he came to visit when I was about 6 months along with quite a large belly already and this was the first time I'd seen him since we'd broken the news. His reaction when he saw me was "Gross!! Now everyone knows what you've been doing!!"
It was not something I'd ever thought of before, and I felt extremely embarassed at the idea of him even thinking about it. Since then, I think exactly the same thing every time I see a pregnant woman, and have a little chuckle at the memory.
Thanks for a great article, sarcastic journalist!
LMAO This is so funny!!! I thought I was the only freak who thought about that....whenever any of my friends I grew up with, or someone's kid got pregnant I couldn't help but think "they did it"! Hahaha I guess I'm not the only one!
that's awesome!!! it's so hilarious cause it's true!!!