The Sarcastic Journalist is a freelance writer and mother of two living near Houston, Texas. She has a degree in journalism and an addiction to magazines. She is hoping never to experience the "joy" of pregnancy again. You can find much more of her home-grown snark at: shenuts.com
In addition to recounting 40 not-so-glowing but hilarious weeks of her pregnancy for our pregnancy calendar the Sarcastic Journalist used her sarcasm super-powers to help make our new edgy sarcastic pregnancy tickers. Check 'em out!
“They” say that your energy should start coming back during the second trimester. For me, having “energy” meant having the ability to get off the couch and make it to the kitchen to get the cookies instead of asking someone else to do it for me.
After a first trimester where rearranging the pillow behind my head seemed like too much effort, I would take any type of energy I could. That’s why, at 15 weeks, I joined a gym.
Getting anything done at the gym often took more effort than the activity I planned on doing. First I’d have to pee about five times, just to make sure I had it all out. Then, I’d weigh myself. I’d have a sip of water. Oh wait, I’d have to pee again.
Eventually, I’d make it to the workout area or the pool, depending on what activity I had planned for that day. Once there, I’d have my hormonal freakout because either the TVs were tuned to the “wrong” station or annoying children were playing in my swim lane.
At one point, I actually had to give myself a “time out” so I wouldn’t cause permanent damage to the young boys playing Marco Polo.
Sure, exercise can produce “endorphins” that might help with all the pregnancy “hormones,” but dealing with all the wahoos at the gym sure cancelled them out.
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I can totally relate. It is more efort for me to get to the gym then actually work out. From finding comfy shoes to finding a shirt that covers everything but doesnt give me that fat and frumpy feeling. I am just glad my gym is still small and uncrowded, toerhwise I would never make it there.
Comment on 11th Nov '06 @ 6:03 pmThis comment is 1
i also have just enough energy to get off the couch to feed myself.i thought i would be back to my good old normal lazy by choice.i find even the three days i spent shopping for christmas but out of commission for a couple of days.i really need to get a good pair of shoes
Comment on 7th Jan '07 @ 9:30 amThis comment is 1
So relieved to hear this. I was worried because I was still tired in the 2nd trimester. Part of it is the lower blood pressure....makes me dozy. Cracked up at your thoughts about the rowdy kids! Glad I'm not alone believing being pregnant doesn't make all other people's kids little angels!!
Comment on 14th Jan '07 @ 8:24 pmThis comment is 1
***hey thats great because i was starting to think i was a lazy bum. But lately i've been having a feeling of wanting to swim! So, your article was funny and touching lol
Comment on 12th Feb '07 @ 4:16 pmThis comment is 1
i felt the same way!
Comment on 12th Feb '07 @ 9:05 pmThis comment is 1
How funny, it feels so good to hear that I'm not the only one going through the no energy thing. The worst part is my gym is only an elevator ride away, and thinking about it takes all of my energy so I don't end up going! Good luck ladies...
Comment on 24th Mar '07 @ 6:39 amThis comment is 1
I am definitly relieved to find I'm not the only one who found my boost of energy was more of just me getting off the couch to go to the kitchen for food instead of asking someone to do it for me.. hahaha I've been waiting for this boost of energy the books talk about and it's never come. I, too, find myself glaring at other people's children as they run rampid through the store. My hormones are all out of whack... :)
Comment on 3rd Apr '07 @ 12:37 pmThis comment is 1
I agree i have never expereinced this burst of engergy people keep talking about during the second trimester. People keep telling me i must have more energy and i just should not be tired all the time....lol going to the gym is a joke and it takes my energy to get their. When people tell me i should get more sleep i tell them my schedual (full time job and full time college student) and ask them to tell me when i should sleep :)
Comment on 12th Apr '07 @ 11:29 amThis comment is 1
I'M GLAD TO KNOW I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE TIRED ALL THE TIME , I AM 15WKS AND STILL FEEL LAZY AND DONT WANT TO DO ANYTHING BUT GET UP AND EAT, I HAVE A DAUGHTER THAT 15 MONTHS SHE ALONE KEEPS ME BUSY AND GETS ME EXCERSING WITH OUT EVEN TRYING OR WANTING TO.WHEN I'M DONE WITH HER AND SHE NAPS I JUST STARE AT MY LAUNDRY HOPEING A MIRACLE WOULD HAPPEN AND IT WOULD GET DONE ALL BY IT SELF JAJAJAJAJAJAJJAJAAJ.
Comment on 23rd Apr '07 @ 5:30 pmThis comment is 1
i totally agree with everything mentioned in the article.the thing that annoys me the most is that everytime a have a sip of water i got to go to the bathroom so i end up visit the toilet instead of working out.
Comment on 25th Apr '07 @ 3:37 amThis comment is 1
i'm really glad i don't have that feeling...ofcourse i'm tyred some times but i'm working 3 jobs so i think it's allowed ;-)
the only thing i also have i going to the toilet...i'm scared to drnk any water cause with my scedule i really don't have any time to go to the bathroom...lol
love sandra
ps sorry for the bad english but i'm from holland
Comment on 12th Jul '07 @ 9:16 amThis comment is 1
ROTFL. I can't stop laughing about this one. hilarious.
Comment on 17th Jul '07 @ 10:26 amThis comment is 1
I promise what I drink goes right through me!!
Comment on 24th Oct '07 @ 4:49 pmThis comment is 1
This was very funny, I thought i was wierd because i am more tired then i was the first trimester, and i find myself more irritable than ever. good one
Comment on 6th Nov '07 @ 2:56 pmThis comment is 1
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Comment on 9th Dec '07 @ 2:05 pmThis comment is 1
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Comment on 31st Dec '07 @ 7:42 pmThis comment is 1
I'm not so sure about working out. I have two kids and that's enough of a workout for me. Besides, I cook, clean, do laundry and run errands. Yeah that's enough. Forget the extra work outs.
Comment on 4th Jan '08 @ 8:24 pmThis comment is 1
I'm having my 3rd in August and my energy is gone. With my second I still had ok energy but now I wish I could stay in bed all day. I wish that was an option. It better come back because if my house isn't spotless by the time this baby is born, my MIL will have a fit. She likes to talk behind my and my sisters in laws back about how clean our houses are. It's rude but that her.
Comment on 5th Jan '08 @ 1:07 pmThis comment is 1
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Comment on 20th Feb '08 @ 5:18 pmThis comment is 1
LOL...last night I had to pee like 6 times
Comment on 29th Mar '08 @ 2:40 pmThis comment is 1
Hahahahahaa. I know what you mean.
Comment on 8th Apr '08 @ 12:00 pmThis comment is 1
i dont have any energy still im always tired and moody im 15 weeks
Comment on 13th Apr '08 @ 1:15 pmThis comment is 1
i realy hope this is verry true i cant stand the way my husband and 3 kids have been leting the house cleaning go it makes me sick just to look at it i have tryed helping but i dont get to far hopefully it will get better and hopefuly soon
Comment on 24th Apr '08 @ 1:17 pmThis comment is 1
I am still vomiting and feeling weak in my 15th week. Working out? Nope, not in my list yet as I can hardly even lift myself off the couch.
Comment on 13th May '08 @ 9:53 pmThis comment is 1
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