Pregnant? Naaah, I’m just big boned!

It always seemed like my pregnancy weight snuck up on me. One minute, I’m sitting there, wondering if I’ll ever start to show and the next I’m on the phone, screaming “13 pounds? How the heck did I gain 13 pounds?”

Pregnancy, for me, means a constant struggle between wanting to pig out and wanting to keep my weight gain to a minimum. The way I look at it is when else are you going to get the “green light” to eat?

It just happened that my green light headed me straight towards the local bakery. Well, the local bakery, the Taco Bell and the ice cream shop.

We all know calcium is very important for pregnant women.

We’ve all heard the stories of women who gained 100 pounds during their pregnancies after eating only cheese for nine months. (Really, what’s wrong with cheese? I happen to like cheese very much.)

“That won’t happen to me!” you say, while munching on a bag of Fritos. “I will keep it under control... only healthy weight gain for me!”

And then, you get hormonal. Since you are pregnant, drinking, smoking and riding roller coasters are out of the question. So, you eat. The bon bons. Macaroni and cheese. Taco Bell. Hamburgers. Oreos.

One month later, when you step on the scale to find out just how much you’ve gained, you almost faint. I have a feeling that most pregnant women, when they see the large number for the first time, actually hope there’s more than one in there.